Read the Transcript:

Hello there and welcome back to The Live Fab Life Podcast. I'm your host, Naomi Nakamura, and I'm back for another solo episode.

Typically, my process for a solo episode is that I write down some main points that I want to cover in the episode and that becomes my outline. Then, I open Otter, a voice dictation app that I use, and then, I speak, whatever it is that I need to say, using my outline with my speaking points. That gives me a transcript which I spend some time cleaning up any grammatical errors (because I have a lot of them), and it also becomes the transcript that I publish on the episode’s show notes. Then I record. This is my process for solo shows.

But this week is a little bit different because I'm just kind of winging it.

So last episode, I wrapped up this series on the Human Design Variables where I shared the Motivation Variable and briefly, the View Variable. Like I did with the Determination, Cognition, and Environment Variables, I want to spend some time, in this episode, sharing what my Motivation is from my own Human Design.

But before we get to that, if you haven't yet listened to any of the past episodes on the Variables, I highly recommend that you listen to Episodes 197-200, then Episodes 204-206.

Now, on to today’s topic. The reason I do episodes with reflections specifically on my own design is not that I want to speak about myself, rather, I want to share with you my thought process of how I look at my design, what I see, what I take from it, how I process it, and what I think about it.

In most cases, I wonder, in hindsight, “How has this shown up in my life in the past?” and then, “What am I going to do with it moving forward?” and “How am I going to integrate it?” This is my purpose for sharing episodes with personal reflections that I did in Episodes 200, 205, and now this one, 208.

As I shared in the previous episode, there are six different kinds of Motivations, and I shared what the Transferred Motivations are as well as the Trajectories are for each Motivation. So, if you haven't listened to that yet, please go and listen to it because it provides context for this one.

In my Human Design chart, my motivation is the Need Motivation. So, if Motivation is what truly compels us to act, what does it mean to have a Need Motivation?

Well, it means looking past the details - not waiting to collect and gather information. Instead, going ahead and doing whatever is necessary to get done, figuring things out as you go because there’s a need that needs to be met, there’s a need that needs to be taken care of. So, when I see a need before me, I’m going to be motivated to action and address it to satisfy the need.

As shared in the last episode, unlike those with a Desire Motivation, those of us with a Need Motivation, we don't need followers - we don't need people to follow us. What we do want is to intimately connect with people - to resonate and connect with them, so that we can help them to meet their needs – that’s how we can impact others. We don't need to inspire everyone, rather it's about inspiring the right people.

So, we're not about getting caught up in details, we’re not motivated by what's right and wrong, we don't see things in black and white. We see and act based on what see needs to be done. We’re not concerned about the “what ifs”, the potential outcomes. We just see the big picture and do what we deem necessary to make forward progress toward it.

There's a couple of things that came to my mind as I learned about this Need Motivation.

I was like, “Wow, this kinda aligns with the Enneagram 1”, which happens to be my Enneagram number because that’s all about justice and doing the right thing.

I remember several years ago when I was first learning about the Enneagram, writing in my journal, “If being a One is about justice, does the end justify the mean?” For the record, I don’t think there’s a straightforward yes or no answer, it depends on the situation. It depends on what the need is.

Secondly, in thinking about my Need Motivation I couldn't help but wonder, “Does this mean meeting a need for me, or a need for you?” The “you” means other people.

I think it's both; I think it’s looking at the big picture, which by the way my Cognition, Outer Vision, is about seeing the big picture, then seeing what the needs are and whether they’re for me or for you.

As per everything in Human Design, led me to reflect on what motivated me to act in past endeavors - when have I acted out of need.

Three different recent situations came to mind.

The first thing happened when I was struggling with endurance marathon training - around 2013, 2014, and 2015. During that time there were so many things going on in my health. It was overwhelming and stressful. I remember that the more I worked on addressing my symptoms, well that’s when I began to debunk a lot of commonly held myths and when I was introduced to Functional Medicine and Functional Nutrition.

There were other endurance athletes I knew, suffering from the same ailments, conditions, and injuries that I had the same injuries and ailments and conditions that I had, and I remember thinking,” What I'm learning needs to be shared because if we don't change what we're doing, we’re going to run ourselves into the ground.

Because I knew the angst, the misery, and the unhappiness I felt always being injured, having all kinds of health ailments, and not just the physical part of it, but the mental and emotional anguish. It impacted my self-esteem. My self-worth wrapped up in the results of my training and always being injured and limited tormented me. And I knew I wasn’t the only one struggling with this.

So, I was motivated to pursue a health coaching certification out of a need I saw to share and help with others what I was learning so they didn’t suffer the way I had. I wanted to help others work through the angst that they felt.

As my health journey progressed, it went beyond endurance training. It also became blood sugar regulation, liver, and digestive health, addressing like SIBO and Leaky Gut Syndrome. It evolved to a need to help others understand what was going on within themselves.

So, here’s one time that I think I acted out of a Need Motivation.

Next is starting this podcast. I launched this show when I was a couple of years into health coaching. As a side gig, there's only so much time I have to devote to it. But I saw, and still see it as a need because I have so much more to say beyond social media posts.

That’s why I started this podcast - I have to get out what I have to say, I have to speak my truth.

And while I know that I can reach more people with a podcast it’s been less about getting more clients (although that’s always nice), it’s about having a message to be shared, a need to share my voice

And now, 200+ episodes later, this isn’t a big podcast. Remember, the Need Motivation isn’t about amassing a ton of followers. But the followers, rather listeners, the ones that reach out to me, deeply connect with what I share - they're here for it.

Sure, I could market the show more to grow my audience, but to be honest, by the time the episode is scheduled to be published, I don’t have much time or energy left to promote it.

If you’ve noticed, I haven’t had any ads on this show at all. That’s something I chose not to do from the beginning and still choose not to.

While I do share about it on Instagram, I’m not all that consistent about it. I would like to be, but life happens.

I also receive pitches from hopeful guests almost daily. And if I accepted more of them, my audience could be much bigger but it’s more important for me to have the “right” guests who align and resonate with my values and the message that I want to share.

I also prefer to share through storytelling, especially through my own experiences because that's really the whole reason why I started this show to begin with.

So, when people from all over the world, from Europe to Australia, to Asia, to Africa, to South and North America it's heartwarming to hear how these episodes have impacted you. So, thank you for listening and if you've reached out, thank you - it's so gratifying for me to hear from you.

3. The third scenario when I've been motivated to act out of Need is what and when I share on social media.

Here's a little sneak peek behind the scenes, if you will, into my Instagram process, which spoiler alert, doesn’t exist no matter how much I try to have one.

I think I joined Instagram in 2008 or 2009-ish, back when you had to post in the moment – “latergram” wasn’t a thing yet. Now Instagram has become this highly curated thing, which by the way, I don't think is a bad thing. There's many curated accounts that I so enjoy.

But, when it comes to what I share on it, I can't tell you how many Instagram courses I've taken and strategies I’ve tried to grow an audience on Instagram. I can't tell you how many hours I've set aside to plan out my feed.

And what I’ve come to learn is that – I. Am. Not. Able. To. Do. That. It feels impossible no matter how many times I try. What comes out of those planning sessions feels inauthentic and feels like garbage. I've finally accepted that planning out my social media is not for me. I am incapable of doing that.

But at the same time, I ask myself, “What am I capable of doing? How do I want to show up?

And I picked this scenario because it encompasses a number of parts of my Human Design:

With my Need Motivation, what I share, for the most part – not all the time, is something that I feel needs to be said which is decided by my Splenic Authority – a knowing that happens in the moment. No wonder trying to plan out my feed feels like a struggle.

However, lately, for a long time actually, I’ve let myself get caught up in the details, worrying about being judged by others – what possible outcomes might be. That is acting out of my Transverse Motivation – the Fear Motivation – acting from an incorrect place for me.

I’ve been getting caught up in: “Should this be a photo or a carousel? A graphic or a reel? A story or a post” I mean, does it even matter?

Do I know enough to be posting about Human Design? What if someone calls me out for being incorrect? Because remember, I’m a Novice with Human Design. Remember my Novice Trajectory where I started off as a Master of something and moved to become a beginner again? After spending six years working with clients as a health coach, here I am in a new space. And while I’ve deep-dived into it for almost two years now, I’m still very much of a Novice, at least that’s how I feel, but at the same time, I’ve felt very confident in my ability to introduce Human Design to dozens and dozens of clients so far and guide them around their designs.

What about all the people who followed me because I coach the 21-Day Sugar Detox program? Even though we want to take a functional approach to our health, most often than not it’s not about our physical health, rather about our relationship with ourselves, how we see and value ourselves – and this is what Human Design is about.

What if people don’t like the graphic?

I’ve felt the need to have to prove myself – prove my expertise, justify my knowledge.

This is all acting from the Fear Motivation, an incorrect place for me so it’s no wonder it’s felt so flat. I’ve felt so disconnected from what I’ve been sharing, even though I feel a Need to share it.

These have been distractions that quite, frankly, have been holding me back from my authentic self, and robbing those who are looking to hear from me, to hear what I have to say.

My undefined Head and Ajna centers are involved here because this overthinking, getting caught up in the details, being worried about saying the right things – well, overthinking has no place in Human Design, no matter what your design is.

But I transparently share that this is where I’ve been and so every day, I try to do my deep work to lean into my Human Design and feel confident in what I have to say and what I have to share.

I even reached out to a friend - a colleague who's another human design coach who’s a Reflector so I know she also has undefined Head and Ajna Centers. I asked her if she ever struggles with this and how she deals with it.

She gave me some good advice - everything that I already knew, but it helps so much to hear someone else say it because coaches need coaches too, right? She reminded me to let my Splenic Authority - my instincts and energy in the moment guide me to the correct timing of what and when to act.

Another observation I had here is that having a Splenic Authority means that I have a defined Spleen Center, which is embodied by the immune system.

So, you know how I just shared how I’ve been acting from Fear, my Transverse Motivation?

Well, over the past almost six months now, I’ve been dealing with some health issues, skin issues on my body. It started at the end of the summer when it was very hot so at first, I thought it was a heat rash.

Then I was told that it was a fungal infection, and my doctor prescribed some anti-fungal meds. It helped but newly affected areas kept appearing.

So, I was referred to a dermatologist, the first one of two, so far, that I’ve seen. That dermatologist told me it was a form of dermatitis or eczema and changed my medication for it. But the same thing kept happening – it helped the affected areas, but new areas keep showing up and here I am, five, almost six months later and I’m still suffering from this.

I even went through a 2-week intense, stressful, and overwhelming period of thinking that I had bedbugs. I even had pest control come out to inspect my home and they couldn't even find evidence of bed bugs or of any bugs.

I’m frustrated – I feel unheard and unseen by the three doctors I’ve seen so far. I feel like my situation has been minimized and dismissed, which is a whole other topic that we may need to discuss sometime.

But as unhelpful as the doctors that I’ve seen have been, the last dermatologist did say one thing that triggered my thinking. She said that even if there are bugs or something in my environment and they’re not affecting anyone else around me, what I’m experiencing is likely an immune response to it.

Energetically, since this started, with the Spleen Center embodied by energetically by fear, and physically by the immune system, I can't help but see the synchronicities with acting from the Fear Motivation and with my skin condition being a response by my immune system to…something.

We tend to look to our undefined and open centers as the areas where we’re vulnerable to conditioning, but we can also experience the energies of our defined centers in unhealthy ways. And while my Spleen is one of two defined centers for me, I haven’t felt very aligned with it as of late.

So now the question is, can I energetically shift and bring myself into alignment to support my immune system? Can I heal myself that way?

It’s certainly an experiment to try and see what happens. And part of that is doing this episode - sharing this experience with you, sharing my thought process and reflections of how this is possibly playing out for me.

From a medical perspective, my next steps here are discussing this with my functional medicine doctor in my upcoming bi-annual visit. I'm going to see what her thoughts are, what she recommends, and possibly see if she can recommend a dermatologist who is more aligned with the functional medicine approach, who can be more helpful to me that way.

But I also want to work on getting past some of the details, fears, and overthinking I find myself caught in.

One way I plan on doing this is by experimenting with social media – working on being less concerned about sharing beautiful, curated images or graphics, or writing the perfect caption.

I'm going to focus on sharing in the moment – following my Splenic Authority and sharing when a knowing comes over me when those moments arise that I feel that it’s important to share what I have to share.

And if I’m not able to post in that very moment, because I’m driving, or walking my dog, or in the shower, or on a conference call, I'm going pick up my phone, and open up my dictation app, and speak to it, in the moment, to capture my thoughts then share it when I’m able to.

Because with my Splenic Authority, if I don’t capture that “in the moment” inspiration, it can go away and never return.

So, here’s my very long-winded reflections on my Need Motivation and this probably won't be the last time I talk about it.

Now, if you are new to Human Design, and this feels a bit over your head, I have a PDF workbook that will introduce Human Design to you. You can download it for free, on my website. It’ll teach you the very basics of Human Design, where you can go to get your Human Design chart. It's called, “Your Human Design, Discovered.” And when you download it, you’ll also receive a code to get a 15% off a live reading with me, where we can really dive into the specifics of your Human Design.

I hope this has been helpful. I'd love to hear your thoughts and what your Motivation is! Come on over and find me on my website at www.livefablife.com/208 for Episode 208. Or you can come over and find me on Instagram at @livefablifewithnaomi.

As always, thank you so much for listening and I'll see you right back here again next week. Bye for now!